Thailand Footprint: The People, Things, Literature, and Music of Thailand and the Region

Posts by Kevin Cummings

Television

Telly

The most important thing we’ve learned,
So far as children are concerned,
Is never, NEVER, NEVER let
Them near your television set —
Or better still, just don’t install
The idiotic thing at all.
In almost every house we’ve been,
We’ve watched them gaping at the screen.
They loll and slop and lounge about,
And stare until their eyes pop out.
(Last week in someone’s place we saw
A dozen eyeballs on the floor.)
They sit and stare and stare and sit
Until they’re hypnotised by it,
Until they’re absolutely drunk
With all that shocking ghastly junk.
Oh yes, we know it keeps them still,
They don’t climb out the window sill,
They never fight or kick or punch,
They leave you free to cook the lunch
And wash the dishes in the sink —
But did you ever stop to think,
To wonder just exactly what
This does to your beloved tot?
IT ROTS THE SENSE IN THE HEAD!
IT KILLS IMAGINATION DEAD!
IT CLOGS AND CLUTTERS UP THE MIND!
IT MAKES A CHILD SO DULL AND BLIND
HE CAN NO LONGER UNDERSTAND
A FANTASY, A FAIRYLAND!
HIS BRAIN BECOMES AS SOFT AS CHEESE!
HIS POWERS OF THINKING RUST AND FREEZE!
HE CANNOT THINK — HE ONLY SEES!
‘All right!’ you’ll cry. ‘All right!’ you’ll say,
‘But if we take the set away,
What shall we do to entertain
Our darling children? Please explain!’
We’ll answer this by asking you,
‘What used the darling ones to do?
‘How used they keep themselves contented
Before this monster was invented?’
Have you forgotten? Don’t you know?
We’ll say it very loud and slow:
THEY … USED … TO … READ! They’d READ and READ,
AND READ and READ, and then proceed
To READ some more. Great Scott! Gadzooks!
One half their lives was reading books!
The nursery shelves held books galore!
Books cluttered up the nursery floor!
And in the bedroom, by the bed,
More books were waiting to be read!
Such wondrous, fine, fantastic tales
Of dragons, gypsies, queens, and whales
And treasure isles, and distant shores
Where smugglers rowed with muffled oars,
And pirates wearing purple pants,
And sailing ships and elephants,
And cannibals crouching ’round the pot,
Stirring away at something hot.
(It smells so good, what can it be?
Good gracious, it’s Penelope.)
The younger ones had Beatrix Potter
With Mr. Tod, the dirty rotter,
And Squirrel Nutkin, Pigling Bland,
And Mrs. Tiggy-Winkle and-
Just How The Camel Got His Hump,
And How the Monkey Lost His Rump,
And Mr. Toad, and bless my soul,
There’s Mr. Rat and Mr. Mole-
Oh, books, what books they used to know,
Those children living long ago!
So please, oh please, we beg, we pray,
Go throw your TV set away,
And in its place you can install
A lovely bookshelf on the wall.
Then fill the shelves with lots of books,
Ignoring all the dirty looks,
The screams and yells, the bites and kicks,
And children hitting you with sticks-
Fear not, because we promise you
That, in about a week or two
Of having nothing else to do,
They’ll now begin to feel the need
Of having something to read.
And once they start — oh boy, oh boy!
You watch the slowly growing joy
That fills their hearts. They’ll grow so keen
They’ll wonder what they’d ever seen
In that ridiculous machine,
That nauseating, foul, unclean,
Repulsive television screen!
And later, each and every kid
Will love you more for what you did.

Roald Dahl
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An essay by  about reading, literature and the impact of Henry Miller’s, THE BOOKS IN MY LIFE …An excerpt:  “For Miller, to express himself about what he read is equal to do self-examination, to recount not what he consumes with his eyes and thought, but what he really is. Just the same as with food, we also are what we read. Perhaps that is why Miller insists that we should learn to read less and less and not more and more, because quality matters more than quantity.” In the Thick of the Life – a WordPress blog

Emilia Almanza Towgood's avatarIn the thick of life

Versión en español

There was one book in particular that inspired me to do this blog and that gave it the tone it has. I could have made a book review blog or a blog where I plainly shouted out what I had on my bare chest (as I have done before). But this blog does not intend to be either of those possibilities.

the books in my life

The book that inspired me was The books in my life by Henry Miller. And when I say that it inspired me I mean it in the most literal way: it gave me air, I felt I could breathe again. Forgotten oxygen came back into my cells. Before me I found a text that reaffirmed my feelings about knowledge and reading, and through which I felt like coming home after roaming the deserts.

For Miller, to express himself about what he read is equal to do self-examination…

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alice cooper 051107

School’s out for summer. School’s out forever. Kindle school, that is. I’ve learned what I need to learn. I’ll glean what I need I need to glean. My third Kindle has broken. It was a free replacement for my second Kindle, which also broke. I ain’t going to Kindle, no more. It has nothing to do with the customer service at Amazon.com USA. The best corporate customer service I have encountered, ever. It has everything to do with paper. I prefer it.

I like picking up a paper novel that I have going in mid-stream and reading 4 pages of content before my brain cells kick in and tell me, “You’ve read these pages before.” No harm; no foul. It’s a good book. They were good pages. Better two times than never at all.

398px-Chethams_library_interior

Does this mean I will never read an Ebook again? No. Just not on a Kindle, Nook or any tablet that is primarily a reader. In the last two years I have probably been 60% Kindle 30% paperback writers and 10% hardcover. Guesstimates. Margin of error: huge. But a man needs a plan. My plan is to go 80% paper and 20% electronic. How? I’m not downloading free books anymore. Yes, there are some good ones out there. But there are more crap ones. I don’t have time for crap, anymore. And those T. Jefferson Parker novel’s for $1 are a pretty good deal, I have to admit. But 9 times out of 10 I never read that $1 book. Ever. So, the plan is, pay the ten bucks or so for the real deal. Read it. Then put it on a shelf or loan it to a friend, face to face not electronically. We do enough stuff online. Online banking is good. Online loaning books to a Facebook friend you’ve never even met in person? Not so good.

No Kindle

This is not meant to be a persuasive post. Forget yourself and forget any inferences you may have drawn. To each his own. There is no right and wrong when it comes to reading. Reading is generally good as long as it’s not a “How To” bomb-making site or anything that encourages hate. Hate = Bad. Period.

As for the 2 out of 10 books I plan to read electronically, I’ll do that on my Kindle Cloud reader via my Samsung 10 inch Google Chromebook. Problem solved.

I do plan to download the free samples and ARCs from NetGalley.com when available, though. So any authors out there, please make those as long and as frequent as possible. Some of you are generous. Some of you skimp a bit too much. But too many times, after reading a good, free sample, I bought the Kindle version and then later bought the paperback. No more. Free sample + paper book if it passes the acid test is part of the plan. Wish me luck. Time for some music.

the-beatles-paperback-writer-parlophone-2

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I’ve just finished watching a 90 minute video/documentary (over the course of two days) called The Henry Miller Odyssey (1969), which I found on an interesting blog: Mia Loves Henry Miller at http://www.mialoveshenrymiller.com . It’s a very interesting odyssey indeed about the life and times of Henry Miller featuring the voice, video clips and good friends of the American writer. He talks of his early days in Brooklyn, his first marriage and the Paris years. Henry’s only regret was that he didn’t go to Paris earlier. He tells of getting fired from one job as an assistant editor of a mail order catalog and a voice over reads from another letter firing him from The Chicago Tribune.

Some of the revelations include his anti-American and pro-Parisian sentiments, moving in with Anais Nin and the importance of her editing. Henry admits if he could have gone back he would have written smaller, slimmer books. At the time he left everything in because he thought everything was important but Anais talks about how everyone was interested in what she deleted or left out from Henry’s writing.

“I will write what no man dares to say and they can take it or leave it. But I think they will take it.” Henry Miller

Handwritten notes about learning watercolors, postcards written, and his break-through novel The Tropic of Cancer. Conversations with Anais Nin reminiscing about their past together in Paris and their writing. The diversity and irregularities of Paris thrilled him as much as the conformity and mundaneness in America bored him.

Henry talks about the joys of many things including the joy of going into the public urinals in Paris, all shown with wonderful video footage of the city and the surrounding provinces. There is something very childlike about Henry Miller, which I think helps explain his joys more than his sorrows.

It’s an insightful look into the life and mind of Henry Miller and how important our attitudes are. I particularly liked some of the footage near the closing with Henry playing at the piano.

Mia Malone Jennings

Mia Malone Jennings

I found the 90 minute free video of The Henry Miller Odyssey far more interesting and entertaining than three of the last four movies I have paid to see. Check it out if you are so inclined by clicking the picture above of Mia Malone Jennings, which will take you to Mia’s blog:

thisishenry1

What are we here for if not to enjoy life eternal, solve what problems we can, give light, peace and joy to our fellow-man, and leave this dear fucked-up planet a little healthier than when we were born. – Henry Miller

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sheraton-grande-sukhumvit

“You’ve got to earn the couch”, one University mountain biker said to his mountain biking buddy as I stood behind them, preparing for the big event in my day – ordering a sandwich at my local deli. Bush Senior was President at the time. It’s an expression I liked immediately, haven’t heard much since but thought about a lot two days ago.

My wife has only two speeds: stop and go. It’s difficult to get her to downshift. I’m more like a Waring 12-Speed blender: no need to work at ice crushing speed when the task at hand only involves blending peanut butter into your yogurt. But last weekend we both got a lot of stuff done. My wife and I had earned the couch. I’m an American. We’re trained, some might say brainwashed, to get stuff done so we can get more stuff. And like the instructions on a shampoo bottle there are those out there that want you to “repeat process” until you hit the grave. Most of the time I ignore them. Sometimes they have a point. My wife had earned the couch and a nice night out. The choice was, The Living Room located on Sukhumvit Soi 12 inside the Sheraton Hotel. I had never been before and neither had she. Time for a new experience.

the-living-room-sheraton-grande-sukhumvit_rob_restaurant

The Living Room is known for its world class Jazz. That night the Steve Cannon Group was playing. I first heard Steve play at CheckInn99 on a Sunday afternoon in May, where I discovered that Steve has some world class chops. I wrote about that experience and Steve here: http://wp.me/p33ZZ6-i2 Discovering Steve’s talent is like a prospector that trips over a 4 lb gold nugget – it does’t take a lot of skill. The skill and talent are all on Steve’s end. Steve was gracious when I introduced myself that day and I learned he worked The Living Room regularly. We had earned the couch, The Living Room has couches and Steve Cannon was playing. Some decisions are easier than others. We went.

World Class Trumpet Player, Steve Cannon

World Class Trumpet Player, Steve Cannon

Steve’s four man jazz combo includes Steve Cannon on trumpet, piano, drums and double bass. Apologies for not getting the other names. Most jazz aficionados agree that without the trumpet jazz is just not the same. It’s been an integral part of jazz from the beginning, long before the piano got on board. The combo was great, the acoustics lively and Steve was the leader on the stage and in The Living Room, where he came over a few times to our cozy couch throughout the evening. It was a weeknight but they still pulled in a nice, comfortable crowd as Steve worked the crowd comfortably on and off the stage. Grover Washington Jr., Dizzy Gillespie, Chet Baker and Lee Morgan were just a few of the compositions we listened to. As jobs go, it seems like a great one to me. We had a great time and we will go back. Next time when Steve plays with his piano playing bother, Randy Cannon.

Steve_Cannon_Album

The jazz schedule at The Living Room located inside The Sheraton Hotel on Sukhumvit Soi 12:

Jazz Schedule

Tim Hedges Piano Solo
Monday – Saturday: from 18:00 hours onwards

The Steve Cannon Band
Monday – Tuesday: from 21:15 hours onwards

The Randy Cannon Group
Wednesday – Thursday: from 21:15 hours onwards

The Randy Cannon Group with Cherryl Hayes
Friday – Saturday: from 21:15 hours onwards

The Cannon Brothers
Sunday: from 21:15 hours onwards

The Tim Hedges Jazz Trio
Sunday Jazzy Brunch: from 12:00 – 14:45 hours

Ratree's Drink

Although It was my first visit to The Living Room it felt like a DejaVu experience when I arrived. Like I had been there before. Then I remembered, I had. One of the many pleasures of reading fiction is not just the characters we meet, it’s the places we get to go. It turns out I had read a novel about another duo that had gotten a lot of stuff done and decided to reward themselves with a night at The Living Room. The duo was fictional detective, Vincent Calvino and his fictional saxophone playing friend, Thai Police Colonel Pratt. The novel is one of my favorites in the Vincent Calvino Crime Series, MISSING IN RANGOON written by well known Bangkok author, Christopher G. Moore and published by Heaven Lake Press in actual paper book form in 2013. The last chapter in the book is Chapter 22. The title of the chapter is, Bangkok: The Living Room.

MissingInRangoon2

I won’t bore you with all the details of the chores that earned my wife and me a visit to The Living Room but in the case of Vincent Calvino and Colonel Pratt all they had done was gone to Rangoon in Myanmar to locate a missing person and break up an amphetamine drug smuggling operation into Thailand. Vincent even worked in a couple of 10K runs while he was there. In the process, guns were fired, people were killed and rich people had to find new ways of getting richer. In short, Vinny and Colonel Pratt had earned the couch.

The chapter begins:

It was closing night at the upscale nightclub, located at a five-star Sukhumvit Road hotel. Yadamar wore a newly tailored tan suit, a purple silk shirt and alligator shoes with shiny soles. He sat behind a grand piano, smiling at the audience, hands dancing across the keyboard as Colonel Pratt finished John Coltrane’s, “My Favorite Things” –which he dedicated to Manee, his wife, who was sitting at a front row table. – The narrative of Christopher G. Moore from his novel, MISSING IN RANGOON

It’s not in the book but my guess is that Pratt’s wife, Manee also earned the couch. The music always sounds better when you do. Given the choice between being a couch potato or earning the couch go for the latter as much as you can. Get out and watch some live music and appreciate the talented musicians that ply their trade all over town in every town, most every night. Read a good book by one of your favorite authors. Get some stuff done. Be nice to your partner if you have one. Earn the couch.

Living_Room_Jazz_Venue

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Lest anyone think I am ignoring the three well known entertainment areas in Bangkok, Thailand on this blog, well, I am … kinda, sorta.

There are tons of web sites that deal with them, not enough that deal with all the other interesting happenings that go on in Bangkok and beyond. My focus is on the latter. Traffic is not my guiding light.

But truth be told these three areas can never be ignored, entirely. Density and velocity is how artist Chris Coles described the attraction of the Bangkok night. The reality is, of the 14 to 21 million visitors Bangkok gets ever year – a number growing by leaps and bounds – more go to these three zones than all the temples combined, despite what you may read from the Tourism Authority of Thailand. Bangkok, Thailand has now been recognized as the top travel destination in the world by Lonely Planet Travel Guides and Mastercard International.

So herewith I present all the cultural advice you will ever need to know about Nana Plaza, Soi Cowboy and Patpong:

Soi Dog #1 by Chris Coles

Soi Dog #1 by Chris Coles

1. Never, ever go to an upstairs bar in Patpong even if you are, hypothetically, with a good mate that is Thai from your hometown in the USA.

2. If you do go to an upstairs bar in Patpong you will be ripped off, even if you are, hypothetically, with a good Thai mate that had lived in Bangkok for over twenty years.

3. By all means check out the culture of Nana Plaza. Everyone has. Mick Jagger has. Anthony Bourdain has. Husbands and wives have. Christian fundamentalists have. Groups of white women have. Groups of Arab men have tried. Go. Check it out. Be appalled. Be titillated. Don’t be a jerk but be something and go.

Jumpin' Mick Flash ...

Jumpin’ Mick …being something

4. Soi Cowboy: Walk up and down the small street. Be surprised how small the street is. Be amazed at what goes on in such a small street. Eat outside. Look at the people. Some will look back. It’s not always easy to differentiate the animals from the spectators at this holy city zoo. Eat the street food. Eat an insect just so you can say you did. The pyropus pesticide levels in one or two grasshoppers won’t kill you.  After that you are on your own.

Soi Cowboy painting by Chris Coles as shown hanging at CheckInn99

Soi Cowboy painting by Chris Coles, shown hanging at CheckInn99  next to the well known White Flamingo, as the talented, Music of the Heart band entertain

5. Don’t drink too much alcohol. It’s poison to the body just like the pesticide in the insects. The body treats them both the same way – let’s get rid of this stuff before It does anything else. Moderation in eating insects and moderation in drinking alcohol. Take the middle path or the deep fried larvae. “Up to you” as the saying goes.

So there you have it. After you’ve been to all three entertainment areas or as Meatloaf says, “Two out of three ain’t bad”, eaten your insects and been in the same places as Mick Jagger and company, congratulate yourself. You’re in Bangkok, Thailand. And there are at least one-thousand other things you can see, eat and do. Better get started. Life is short. And economists can be philosophers, if you listen.

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Henry Miller,  ink and acrylic on wood by Jamie Lawson - 2010

Henry Miller, ink and acrylic on wood by Jamie Lawson – 2010

Life moves on, whether we act as cowards or heroes. Life has no other discipline to impose, if we would but realize it, than to accept life unquestioningly. Everything we shut our eyes to, everything we run away from, everything we deny, denigrate or despise, serves to defeat us in the end. What seems nasty, painful, evil, can become a source of beauty, joy, and strength, if faced with an open mind. Every moment is a golden one for him who has the vision to recognize it as such. – Henry Miller

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Elsie Evans - Proprietor, instructor and artist at Attic Studios

Elsie Evans – Proprietor, instructor and artist at Attic Studios

I love all things Google. Last Thursday I plugged in “ART LESSONS + BANGKOK” into the almighty search engine and up popped http://www.attic-studios.com. Who am I to argue with their algorithm magic? My wife is a talented artist whom had her talent repressed by logical Thai society and ended up being an accountant for many years. Did she like being an accountant? A story for another day. I, on the other hand, have zero artistic talent but face the reality, daily it seems, that I will die one day – hopefully not soon. We thought it would be fun to take art lessons – together. We’re dare devils at heart. She, to increase her talent and me to face my fear head-on and jump outside the box. In this case clear up into the Attic. Attic Studios in Bangkok, Thailand to be more precise.

So it was that same morning we headed down, brilliantly without an appointment and in my case a clue, to Attic Studios. It turns out that just one block over from the Dead Artist Bars of Sukhumvit 33 in Bangkok you can find a lot of actual live artists and breathing art studios on and off of, Sukhumvit 31.

Upon entering Attic Studios we found several children in the middle of a group art lesson painting at easels while looking at a live model dressed in traditional Thai costume. We were only on the ground floor of the three story art studio. Elzan, the young assistant to Elsie Evans, was very pleasant, very helpful and very informative. She pleasantly informed us that we couldn’t have chosen a worse time to drop in (my bad) but we should go up the stairs to the second floor and wait for Elsie, whom was teaching on the third floor until 1:00 p.m. or 30 minutes away. It seems I was standing in front of the live model and this made it rather difficult for the kids to do their assignment. So we did. We went upstairs.

children

The second floor of Attic Studios looked amazingly like what you would expect from an art studio. Bookshelves full of art books – color coded, no less. And I mean tons of books. A comfortable couch for waiting. Tea and coffee available. And clutter. But not the kind of clutter I produce. No. This was artistic clutter. The kind of clutter that looked cool. The kind of clutter you want to leave as is because … well, because it looks cool. The kind of clutter you wanted to learn how to make, which in my case was why I was there.

art_supplies

As we waited I felt I was in a time warp: adult students came down from the third floor. Parents came up from the first to wait for their children to finish their lesson. And they all looked like they lived in Santa Cruz, California, which once made a Top 100 Artist’s Towns in the USA with populations under 100,000. Only I was in a South East Asian City of 9 to 12 million people, depending on whether she is in yin mode or yang mode, so it was all a bit surreal.

life-drawing

Elsie came down and let us know that she was in the middle of teaching but would be happy to talk to us in about 15 minutes. No worries. It may have been the worst possible time for them but I was enjoying myself. My wife tactfully reminded me that people do make appointments in civilized society and I nodded my head as I looked at the canvas paintings stacked about the walls.

Elsie_4FRG0166

Elsie came down a second time, apologized for the clutter that I was envious of, and proceeded to be charming, inquisitive, patient and most of all genuinely interested in what both my wife and I were interested in, which happened to be quite different from each other. Elsie also gave us a tour of the third and final floor – the main studio, which was also very cool. Cool is cool. It’s as good a word as any to describe all three levels of Attic Studios. As a bonus, Elsie and I both share Scottish ancestry. In Elsie’s case she was born in Scotland before coming to Thailand over twenty years ago. You get the feeling that Elsie has seen every level of art student and in my case every level of fear and her solution seems to be: start. Casual, modest, comfortable and obviously talented with people and art is how I describe Elsie Evans.

Henry Miller, when he went into his Big Sur phase, where he painted a lot, had a security guard to keep unwanted visitors out. And those that were allowed in, were required to read a long hand-written note posted the old fashioned way by Henry on his gate, reminding people, among other things : “When you come please be so kind as to check your neuroses and psychoses at the gate.” I can surmise that Elsie Evans has the type of personality that would have earned her a first name basis with Henry’s security guard and a visit to see Henry any time, had she wanted to. A visit Henry would have looked forward to, not dreaded as he must have with some of his visitors/fans.

Henry Miller's notice to visitors at the gate to his modest Big Sur home

Henry Miller’s hand-written notice to visitors posted at the gate to his modest home now resides at The Henry Miller Memorial Library in Big Sur

There is a quote on the Attic Studios web site, attributed to Elsie that I particularly liked. Since I am doubtful about my artistic ability, it is comforting to know that someone as good and as interesting as Elsie Evans also had that thought. I suspect it is just one of many reasons that make her a good instructor:

Over the years I have painted many portraits in pastel, oil and acrylic. I started them initially because I thought I couldn’t do them ……Wow I was right!!!  They were awful. But the human face, all around us, young, old handsome, ugly is fascinating, I had to persevere, still have to. The fluidity of the face is what interests me the most. – Elsie Evans

My hope is, this will not be the last post on this blog about Attic Studios. That I, too, will persevere. Being good at something provides a certain comfort level. Not being good at something and doing it anyway is a whole different ballgame. I am looking forward to learning the rules of the game from Elsie Evans.

corporate

Attic Studios provides Adult Workshops; Junior Workshops; Life Drawing Classes; Corporate Events; School Visits; First Friday Events as well as Mural Paintings and Art Restoration. For more information visit their web site,  where all the photos used in this blog post came from: http://www.attic-studios.com/ or LIKE them on Facebook at Attic Studios.

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The above quote is attributed to author, Gore Vidal; he wrote Myra Breckinridge, among many other novels.

Myra

Why would a successful author make such a quote? Was it in jest? Perhaps. But he was addressing an age old emotion – envy. We’ve all had it. That lottery winner that coulda, shoulda been me or you. Why is it so hard to be happy for others success? Or is it? Because it appears that way to me. To be genuinely happy for the success of another should come naturally. The footnote on this blog by Voltaire is about appreciation. And what is appreciation in a literary sense? For me, it’s a recognition of excellence. When it comes to a good novel, I know in my heart of hearts that I could not have written something that good. But I can appreciate reading it perhaps as much as anyone. And I am thankful that there are people out there that can do it – better than I could ever dream of doing it. Are we envious of the heart surgeon that has the ability to save lives? Are we jealous of him or her? I think not. But in the literary world there seems to be a lot of online jealousy, a lot of pettiness and a lot of silliness. Or maybe I’m all wet? Maybe I got it all wrong and it’s one big cheer leading section with everyone rooting for one another – the American version of root, not the English one, I think.

Here is what I know: when I am happy for the success of another, I feel happy. When I am envious of the success of another, I never feel good. Ever. So why would I choose that route?

envy

 

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Henry Miller at Big Sur

Henry Miller at Big Sur

On the About / Mission page of this blog a Henry Miller quote concludes with, “Forget yourself.” What did Henry mean by that? Only he would know for sure. In my initial interview with Legendary Surfers author, Malcolm Gault-Williams, I asked him if he agreed with the entire quote? Malcolm did agree, except for those two commanding words. It was a good answer but it was not the answer I expected. Not the one I wanted. How often do we ask a question with our answer already in mind? Too often, for me. People can be like the guy at the race track that has already decided which horse he will bet on because of the name of the horse or the color of the jockey’s silks but then goes to the racing form for information to back up his unwavering choice. Malcolm is right – when you write you cannot forget yourself, entirely. You need to add that special ingredient, as he puts it, to make the writing unique. But the best story, in my opinion, is almost always elsewhere.

“Develop an interest in life as you see it; the people, things, literature, music – the world is so rich, simply throbbing with rich treasures, beautiful souls and interesting people. Forget yourself.”― Henry Miller

Years ago I met someone for the first time at my Bangkok gym. We would later become friends. On that initial meeting I was on a weight machine. Dick, the name of my future friend, was on the next machine over. As he rested he struck up a conversation with me. My first impression of Dick was, “fat cat”. He was older than me by a good 20 years, heavy but in good shape and very tan, which made his blue eyes look even bluer. He wore a singlet and had a thick gold chain around his neck. A lot thicker than the $100 string I was wearing. Circumference does matter to some, I’m told, when it comes to gold. He was friendly enough but I was probably terse with him as I have this peculiar idea that gyms are for exercising not so much for socializing. In short, I was thinking about myself at the time, as we humans tend to do, rather than thinking about the opportunity to meet a new friend that didn’t fit the mold of my friends back in California.

Over the next few years I would share many meals with Dick and my circle of friends in Thailand. And a few beers too. Dick was always fun to be around. I would also tend to run into him from time to time, even when I was out of town. He always made room for a bit of conversation and sometimes those bits would lead to a few more beers. He came to our family Christmas party one year with a video recorder running as he entered the front door and was very entertaining all evening, yet always polite. We shared some things in common, Dick and I. He also split his time between Thailand and the USA – in his case, Maine. Our schedules were similar: winter and spring in Thailand. I always enjoyed catching up after not seeing each other for six months. Dick was generous, with his time and with his compliments. He was the opposite of a balloon chaser – the type of guy who would be a regular at a pub and then stay away when they had a free meal promotion, figuring someone else could use the seat and the meal that day more than he. One year he came back and his thick, heavy gold chain was missing. “Where’s your gold chain, Dick?” I asked when I noticed right away. “Oh, I gave it to my nephew. He always liked it and he’s a senior on his Florida high school football team this year”, he replied with his trademark smile. Dick was always proud of his family members back in the USA. It turned out that Dick wasn’t really a fat cat at all. He was a retired accountant that was more of a cool cat, even at over 70 years old. Dick was one of those guys whom you were always happy to see and when you left you always felt a little better. And I was never exactly sure why that was?

Henry Miller while paiting

Henry Miller while painting

After about 5 years of friendship and good memories I learned, from a mutual friend while I was in California, that Dick died of a heart attack, suddenly, during a visit with family members in Florida at the age of 76. His funeral was to be held in Maine. I didn’t go and like most regrets I have it is the things I didn’t do which I regret most. But I did get a chance to communicate with his son, a few times via email and once we spoke on the telephone. During the course of that conversation I expressed to his son that Dick was a friend and I liked him very much. I told him I used to tell his dad that he reminded me of my Uncle Al, a very important man in my life. I also told him how Dick had a way of making everybody around him feel good. His son responded, “My dad was the kind of guy that was always interested in what you were interested in.” And he was. And that was it – that’s what I couldn’t put my finger on. Henry Miller, I suspect, would have liked Dick a lot. Because Dick understood what Henry meant. Dick was confident in who he was, just as I believe Henry Miller was confident, on most occasions, with who he was. They both knew, more often than not, that the best story, the best moments in life, were not about them.

When you are interested in what other people are interested in, you find what Henry Miller found: interesting people. Will it happen every time? No, but often enough, that I would bet on it.

saratoga

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